The Guildhall

Well, the £230,000 refurbishment of the centre is finished. It hasn’t changed the cinema at all. This week there are a couple of chances to see a live relay of a play called Prima Facie, from the National Theatre. It’s a one-woman show, starring Jodie Comer, so you might as well watch it on screen. It’s about a lawyer who struggles with the patriarchy, as people do in plays. Most of us spend more time struggling with parking. There’s also Eric Ravilious: Drawn to War, a documentary about the WWII artist, with a bit of footage and lot of commentary from admirers. Approved by the family, if that’s an attraction. And then there’s Moonage Daydream, a documentary about David Bowie, with a lot of concert footage. Am I the only person in Britain who finds St David of Bromley a bit over-rated? He certainly got a lot of help from his friends, not least when he was so drug-addled he couldn’t wash his own smalls.

The Roses

The Roses has See How They Run, a ‘comedy whodunnit’ set in the 1950s. Actors working on a hit West End play are derailed when one of the cast is murdered. With Saoirse Ronan, Harris Dickinson, Sam Rockwell, Adrien Brody and Ruth Wilson. It also has Ticket to Paradise, a glossy bruised-fruit romcom with George Clooney and Julia Roberts.

The Sherborne

The Sherborne has Ticket to Paradise but also Mrs Harris Goes to Paris, in which Leslie Manville plays a 1950s cleaning lady who goes to Paris after becoming besotted with a Dior dress and scrimping and saving to buy it. According to Rotten Tomatoes, the film is made ‘In partnership with the House of Dior’. It is apparently escapist froth, and a lot of people are very happy with that. Personally, I shall wait for the Primani knock-off.

The Cineworlds

Hilarious banner on Cineworld’s website: ‘Please note due to circumstances beyond our control, we will be operating a reduced ViP menu, consisting of popcorn and soft drinks only. Ticket prices will be temporarily adjusted to reflect the reduced menu.’ Being a ViP has rarely seemed so unappealing. The site also wants to tell you lots about its exciting Starbucks concession. Are there any films? Well, there’s a kids’ CGI thing called Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile. There’s Amsterdam, a sort of mystery with a vaguely historical American setting and a big-name cast: it has been comprehensively rubbished by the critics. There’s The Lost King, a Stephen Frears ‘life-affirming’ comedy, again based loosely on real events, in this case the campaign by an amateur historian to prove that some bones found under a car park in Leicester were those of Richard II. With Sally Hawkins and Steve Coogan, among others. Lots of praise for Sally, not much for anything else. And, confusingly, there’s The Woman King, a film about a female African ruler that has garnered a lot of controversy. You’ll probably have read about it it if confected outrage is your thing.

The Tivoli

Somebody remind me, what is The Tivoli?